I am Pregnant, Exhausted, and Functioning on Pure Cerebral Momentum

The brain has an elite, almost militaristic capacity to continue functioning when the body waves its white flag.

I currently rely on that ruthlessly.

While my physical form languishes in hormonal chaos, my mind pirouettes through complex thought with the same velocity it always has — analyzing, calculating, interpreting like a research algorithm.

It’s such a bizarre sensation:

my body belongs to this pregnancy,

but my mind still belongs to mathematics, anatomy, sociolinguistics, cosmology —

anything that could anchor me to myself.

I am two entities at once:

biological and intellectual,

deteriorating and ascending.